Here’s a funfact : Worship uplifts you. Fellowship strengthens you. (Ideally, the sweet fellowship of the Holy Spirit)
In the night, (there is a perfect crescent moon in the navy blue sky. No stars. Just the moon. Not centrally placed. Awkwardly positioned where a shared side-plate would be at a formal dinner table) I pick out a home from not too far. There’s lights.
We’ve maintained Sonko’s mansion to our general left. We can’t be too lost. “Should this house be the one we’re looking for, with a water tank outside, I’ll cry” I think to myself. (About a month ago when we came for the reconnaissance, said house was only about 15minutes from camp.)
I keep up pace. I’m singing psalms and lifting the King. I’m enjoying a wonderful fellowship with the Holy Spirit. I continue repenting for many things that He convicts me on. Let me bare myself here, for me, today, it’s mostly omissions. Not what I do, but what I do not do, that I know I ought to. Passivity. Not speaking out. Refusing to defend His cause. We go from Not reading scripture when and how I ought to, to refusing to reach out, regardless of who is at fault.
I’m reminded of James 4:17 [NLT] , “Remember, it is sin to know what you ought to do and then not do it.”
There are no words in any human language that can explain the joy I felt just seeing that black water tank. Positioned right next to the perimeter fence. I couldn’t even cry. This joy transcended that. Here’s what got me, in that moment. We had not arrived yet. We still had some ground to cover. My back was in more pain than I have ever felt before. But that didn’t matter. Because that water tank in that lone homestead, gave this hope that, we’re almost there. That soon, there’s rest. Soon, it’s all going to be over. A shower to soothe my back. And food, to soothe my stomach. Hehe. And I began to repent some more, for ignoring the ultimate hope of all things… Jesus Christ.
Colossians 1:27b[NKjV] “…which is Christ in you, the hope of glory.”
To think how many times I act hopeless. Speak hopeless. Think hopeless. Just because I’m between a rock and 2 hard places. Because time has ran out. Deadlines have passed. Resources are unavailable. Et cetera. I forget that Christ is in me. Yoooh. CHRIST JESUS IS IN ME! And that should excite me. Fill me with gladness. Fuel me for a lifetime! Set me in places above Kings. This is not just a man from Galilee. The carpenter of Nazareth. This is The Christ! The Boss! The King. And He Is In Me!
I realise that after all is said and done, and more has been said, than done, my life is in the state it’s in because of such apathy! That the King resides in me and my reaction to that is, . .. Yaay! Or, Oh joy! 😑. Such lack of interest! Such rudeness! Such dark response to light and life!
If the black water tank could speak to my entire being, easing up even my back, the King of the universe in me should cause me to evolve all together. Because, He is fully committed to my wellbeing, and I think that’s ok? That’s nice? Nooo. That is unimaginably out of this world! WHOOOA! 🙌.
We stumble right into the camp’s gate. It honestly takes me by surprise. It’s almost too soon! It was unexpected! Even the kids do not realise at first that we’re here. But we are. Albeit 12hrs later! Glory to God! 🙌.
The crys for joy! The victory dances. The songs of adoration. Beautiful. Absolutely beautiful. 😅
As I throw myself onto a verandah, watching the kids pitch their tents ahead of dinner, I am grateful for the lessons. I have this awkwardness plastered on my face. My heart is warm. My back is hurt. My life feels put together. I recline against the wall and take it all in.
Then The Master, gently, softly, says, “It is sad that it takes me all that to get your attention”.
The stinging, affection-infused words of a lover.
I mull over those words. I pull them apart in my mind. I taste them separately in my mouth.. And then together.
“What, Bryan, must the King do to get your attention? Because, He will” I follow up to myself.
*** The End***